Beyond Rules: A Dilettante’s Guide to Personal Sovereignty, Space Travel, and Lots of Ice Cream by Fabian Kruse

Author:Fabian Kruse [Kruse, Fabian]
Language: eng
Format: mobi
Tags: life, beyond rules, personal sovereignty, self-development, personal development
Publisher: Fabian Kruse
Published: 2012-03-14T00:00:00+00:00

Define Your Own Success

The off-the-shelf definition of success still seems to be living in a mansion, driving a huge car, and always being able to buy the latest gadgets. If we look at Maslow’s findings, we have to question this definition – and start making our own.

To be sure, if your definition of success was living in a mansion, driving a huge car, and always being able to buy the latest gadgets, I wouldn’t really have a problem with that. (Well, I would probably think it’s a little stupid, but I suppose you would think the same about my own definition, so we’re even!)

The real problem is that many of us get too easily distracted by shiny new gadgets and professional marketing. As a consequence, we adapt definitions of success that don’t really matter all that much to us at the core, and often even stress us out. It might thus be a good idea to get clear about what success doesn’t mean to us, and to get conscious about how we are being manipulated.

Advertising and marketing are all around us. Even though we may despise that, it’s currently simply the way it is – and not all the people responsible for it are necessarily evil. But it’s up to us to identify their tricks and methods, and develop a healthy resistance to it. Instead of becoming marketing gurus, we should work on becoming marketing-proof. (This would probably be an interesting topic for another book…)

Often, we tend to equalize success with obtaining a thing or a situation we strongly desire. But, as Eric Weiner points out in his book The Geography of Bliss, this connection doesn’t really exist on a neurological level: We strive for the camera or for the lear jet, but once we own it, we aren’t any happier than before. This is a consequence of our natural human programming: We get what we wanted – but instead of feeling content, we just feel hollow again pretty fast.

Traditionally, instead of drawing the consequences, and developing a different concept of success, we just replace our old desire with a new one – an even better camera, an even nicer jet, – and continue to long for stuff instead of finding happiness in the moment.

The lesson? Desire can motivate us to move, but fulfilling it doesn’t necessarily lead to a deeper and lasting feeling of contentment.

***

There isn’t really any definition beyond our very own that matters, so spend some time thinking about it: What would the good life look like for you, and how would you know you are living it?

Remember, there are no rules in these exercises:

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